When someone you know is struggling with Sex Addiction, or any addiction for that matter, they’re likely very accomplished at hiding their problem. They could be months or years deep into their addiction and have it so incorporated into their daily life that they don’t even recognize they have a problem. Helping them starts here.
The Problem With Loving a Sex Addict
Its arguable that a sex addict’s loved ones suffer just as much, if not more than the addict themselves. Spouses, children, friends, and family are forced to look on as powerless observers as a person they love tears themselves apart in an endless search for the next sexual experience. Perhaps you recognize that your loved one is grappling with anxiety, loneliness, pain, or other forms of stress, and is turning to sex as a release. Perhaps you are furious with the impact this person has had on your life and others that you love. Perhaps you’ve tried to help this person time and time again, only to experience failure. Regardless of your motivations, there are ways that you can go about dealing with this problem that do work.
It’s Not About The Addict
The most common problem for loved ones dealing with sex addicts, or addicts of any kind, is that they always focus exclusively on the thoughts and behaviors of the addict in their life. They try and create solutions for what they consider problem behaviors, and always fail because they don’t recognize a fundamental truth; that they have absolutely no control over the actions of other people. Loved ones often try and establish rules to reign in the behavior of an addict, but the addict always finds ways to circumvent them.
The key is to stop focusing on the behaviors of an addict, and instead take into consideration your actions. You can’t stop an addict from being an addict, but you can have a substantial impact on the pain and suffering they cause you and those around you by carefully considering patterns of thought and behavior in you that result from the behavior of an addict. Addicts are creatures of habit, and rely upon the patterns of behavior of those around them to enable their endless pursuit of their addiction. Recognizing the patterns that you are responsible for allows you to interrupt them, and put an addict one step closer to recognizing that they have a problem.
Whitestone Sex Addiction Clinic
The self-awareness that we are advocating here is not an easy one to cultivate. Recognizing the patterns of thought and behavior that enable the addict in your life to be an addict is just as difficult for you as recognizing an addiction is for an addict. If a loved one in your life is suffering from sex addiction, and you’d like to understand how your patterns of thought and behavior can be changed to limit the impact they have on your life and those around you, get in touch with Whitestone Clinic.